Being dominant

Squirting Elf Estates, Drakon (215.153,225.762,25.2265)

Being a dominant doesn't mean being an asshole, being abusive, and being a commanding jerk. I'm sorry, that's just not how it works. It's just like how being a submissive doesn't mean being a total doormat to anyone who claims to be dominant.

Real confidence is knowing when to be assertive and when not to be. It's being subtle when necessary, being calm and collected. Real dominance means you shouldn't have to yell to get your way, it will just happen. It's recognizing that even in D/s relationships, it's still a two-way street - power exchange is voluntary, and you only have control if the submissive wants you to. It has a lot to do with trust and trust must be earned. You cannot expect to just command someone because you happen to be a dominant.

A real dominant should inspire submission, not command it. He should never have to say he's dominant, he just is. There's a lot of intangibles, really. It takes experience.